How to remember what semibreve, minim, crotchet, quaver and semiquaver mean

Semibreve (USA: whole note)

Dragged out of the hole (whole note) is a lady who has just finished her freediving session but she is only semi breathing (semibreve).

Minim (USA: half note)

Think of a minim (USA half note) as the letter 'd' which stands for dog.

But imagine that the 'd' for dog is half dog and half Minnie Mouse (minim).

Crotchet (USA quarter note)

Think of a crochet (USA quarter note) as a golf club.

But a quarter of the golf club players (one of the players) has been using a croquet (crotchety) mallet instead of a club.

Quaver (USA:eighth note)

Think of a quaver as a big bird with a long beak.

Imagine the bird landing and grabbing an 8-ball (eighth note) from a pool table but the bird is so big it causes an earthquake (quaver).

Semiquaver (USA sixteenth note)

Lets make it easy on ourselves and say that if we can remember a quaver then a semiquaver is not quite a quaver, so it is the next one down on the musical note tree.

Quaver = `1/8` so Semiquaver = `1/16`